(Credit: Austin Young)
This week, our comedian crush Ms. Margaret Cho rolls into town, so we tugged her arm and posed one reader's query on how to get back on the proverbial horse...in extenuating circumstances.
Q: Dear Comic: How do I say this? I've hit a bit of a dry spell. Yes, I've been really busy with work, and rather pre-occupied. And, uh, living with my very religious and strict Republican parents hasn't lead to much hot boy-on-boy action for me. Any tips on how to remedy this?
A: I think what you need to do is to make a “dick wish.”
I think this is the best way for anyone to get the dick, or whatever they want or need. It is sort of like “The Secret,” in that you put something out to the universe, and it will inevitably come back to you. So make a dick wish. Take a moment of your day to think about the kind of dick that you would like to have, the particular qualities you would prefer, the best dick situation you can imagine. Make your wish clear and descriptive. Don't leave anything out! Really make sure that you have a positive attitude about the whole thing. Don't worry about your parents, and don't worry about your schedule and how you will manage to fit that dream dick in with all that. Just focus on the dick.
It will come to you.
For more of Margaret Cho's sage wisdom and NSFW advice, get yourself to the Orpheum Theater on March 20-21 for a rare L.A. stand-up appearance. Don't be late, because YouTube badass Liam Sullivan (remember the "Shoes" video?) is opening up.
