There she is...Miss Hooker '08
(Credit: Natalia Fabia)
Wednesday, March 26
Kaki King at the Roxy
What: Virtuoso Kaki King makes a departure from both New York and her finger-picking, geetar-thumping instrumental past to perform a new set of dark, catchy pop at the Roxy.
Why: Don’t get us wrong, the wordless compositions were jaw-dropping, but we’re glad she stepped behind the mic and started singing. Katch it: The Roxy, West Hollywood; 9 p.m.; $14
Thursday, March 27
Ed Fox signing at Taschen
What: Los Angeles-born naked-lady photographer Ed Fox signs copies of his Taschen release “Glamour From the Ground Up,” which celebrates his secret love of porn stars' shapely, curvy, sensual…feet. Oh.
Why: If you're into slick photographs of half-nude women, this is for you. If you're into just their feet, this is also for you.
Ped it: Taschen Store, Beverly Hills; 6 p.m.-8 p.m.; free
Friday, March 28
Kids in the Hall's “Brain Candy” midnight screening
What: The NuArt hosts a midnight screening of the first (and only) Kids in the Hall flick. The film features cross-dressing Canadians with impeccable timing performing musical numbers while on hardcore antidepressants.
Why: Because it's the best movie ever. OK, one of the best movies ever.
Suck on it: NuArt, West L.A.; midnight; $9.50
Saturday, March 29
“Hollywood Apocalypse” juried art show
What: As an artsy homage to Nathanael West's novel “Day of the Locust,” Black Maria first invited a slew of artistes to create interpretations of an L.A. apocalypse; then the gallery invited Patricia Arquette (hello!) and the Punisher (aka the recently arrested Thomas Jane) to select the best scene of metropolitan destruction.
Why: Because the winner supposedly gets a set of "Medium" DVDs, but the rest of us get to stare at Patricia Arquette from across the room. Show closes April 19.
Intuit it: Black Maria Gallery, Atwater Village; reception 7 p.m-10:30 p.m.; free
Sunday, March 30
Sundaze at Hopscotch
What: Get your tattered, hung-over soul to Hopscotch at the Custom Hotel for a day of poolside vegetative luxury, with the added spice of good DJs and hot Westsiders.
Why: There is no better day than Sunday to stare vacant-eyed in tranquil repose near a body of high-class water.
Zone it: Custom Hotel, El Segundo; 1 p.m.-9 p.m.; no cover, but RSVP requested
Monday, March 31
Dodgers season: it's official
What: Remember the Dodgers? That baseball team that played that sport, but they went away for a few months? People, hot dog season has officially started, as the boys in blue face off against the Giants in tonight's season opener.
Why: Microwaved veggie dogs and highlight reels on YouTube just weren't doing it for us.
Swing it: Dodger Stadium, Echo Park; 1:10 p.m.; $11-$130
Tuesday, April 1
Natalia Fabia's Miss Hooker Pageant
What: Underground art darling and official smokin'-hot babe Natalia Fabia hosts a bonanza of all things prostitutional, with homages to her glamorized fine-art hooker paintings, a glitter-dusted pageant and a sparkly new jewelry line.
Why: We thought hookers established rank with fistfights behind dumpsters, but it's good to know that Ms. Fabia is elevating the culture. (P.S. No, we're not April-fooling you.)
Streetwalk it: Dragonfly, Hollywood; 9:30 p.m.; $3 cover
Comrades, we've given you more than enough reasons. Now get out there.
Alie Ward is Events editor for Metromix Los Angeles
