Dear H&B,
My penis is enormous. When girls see it, they act into it but then get freaked out. My male friends say they wish they had a tool like mine, but when we talk about our experiences, they don’t talk about girls being afraid because they might get hurt. This is supposed to be a good thing, but it really isn’t if the girls don’t like it. What can I do, or where can I find women who will accommodate my slacks pack?
Large and Not in Charge
Dear LANIC,
While some skeptics may find your pants problem a little hard to swallow, lots of women will tell you that encounters with a hefty schween is anything but pleasurable. (Some might even mean it.) It’s no picnic when an evil battering ram like yours meets an innocent cervix, so take it easy with the lady parts. Despite what porn schooling would have you believe, they’re delicate. Keep a vat of lube on hand. You may also want to look into older women who’ve had not only experience, but kids. In other words, something larger than even your boss boff stick has traversed a mother's loins.
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