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Next

Sci-fi romance proves Nicolas Cage + Jessica Biel = zero chemistry

By Brett Buckalew

April 27, 2007

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There's something inherently laughable in pairing Oscar winner Nicolas Cage and "7th Heaven" beauty Jessica Biel as romantic leads. Essentially polar opposites in terms of physical attractiveness and acting talent, watching them flirt and eventually lock lips onscreen in "Next" spurs unintended laughs.

Their love story has all the ingredients for instant camp appeal. Cage plays Cris, a Vegas magician whose stage name of "Frank Cadillac" comes from his love of Frankenstein and vintage cars, and the vapid Biel awkwardly assumes the role of a schoolteacher (to Native American children, no less).

As unintentionally hilarious as the romance is, "Next" also aims to be a sci-fi thriller, and whenever the film shifts its focus to that goal, it devolves from so-bad-it's-good to just plain bad.

In a gimmicky story hook, Cris can see two minutes into the future. An FBI agent (Julianne Moore) wants to harness his clairvoyance to prevent a nuclear attack planned by Eurotrash baddies, but Cris dodges this responsibility so he can cozy up to Biel's Liz.

Of course, there wouldn't be much of a movie if Cris didn't end up trying to foil the terrorist plot, but the action scenes have such an enervated feel that there still isn't much of one.

Moore registers as similarly fatigued, demonstrating a palpable lack of interest in her stock ball-busting bureaucrat role. At least she's an actor who rarely stoops to a paycheck gig, which can no longer be said about Cage (who was slumming in "Ghost Rider" just a couple months ago).

Playing a shirt-doffing, starlet-wooing action hero may satisfy the actor's ego, but for audiences, it's getting more than a little pathetic.

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