Captain Shakespeare (Robert De Niro) dances with Yvaine (Claire Danes) as Tristan (Charlie Cox) looks on in “Stardust.”
(Credit: David James/Paramount)
- Running time:
- 128 minutes
- Rated:
- PG-13
- Cast:
- Claire Danes -
- Yvaine
- Charlie Cox -
- Tristan
- Robert De Niro -
- Captain Shakespeare
- Michelle Pfeiffer -
- Lamia
- Sienna Miller -
- Victoria
(2 ratings)
Big questions: Can "Stardust" capture the vision of Neil Gaiman's book, despite the fact that all of the movie's special effects appear to have been retrieved from the '80s? How did all these top-shelf actors get roped into such a bottom-shelf movie?
Skip it: "Stardust" is like nothing you've seen before, and we don't mean that in a good way. This is fantasy that never takes flight but instead sputters around, doing hopelessly earnest and self-consciously weird stuff that just registers as actors pathetically trying to look like they're having fun.
Catch it: Well, you won't see another movie this year that has a unicorn engulfed in flames. Does PETA represent fictional creatures?
Bottom line: "Stardust" is a disaster that's not upsetting but plenty embarrassing—with the exception of a few moments when the movie seems to wink at its own awfulness. The rest of the time it's a ridiculous parody of itself that would fall into the "so bad it's good" category if it weren't so surprisingly boring.
Bonus: Any Howard Dean supporters may want to alert his people that De Niro's pirate has stolen the politician's campaign slogan. As De Niro explains, reputations take "a lifetime to build, seconds to destroy."
SHOWTIME LISTINGS
Movie theaters and showtimes for Stardust in Los Angeles.
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